An art forgery expert is set on an involuntary adventure that promises to solve an old crime and reveal the secret of her vanished family, all this after a mysterious man delivers an unusual package to her apartment.

My biggest tip would be to make your logline chronological as your logline jumps around a bit and becomes very long and convoluted. Try and keep it clear and concise focusing on the story the way you would tell it in the screenplay.

My biggest tip would be to make your logline chronological as your logline jumps around a bit and becomes very long and convoluted. Try and keep it clear and concise focusing on the story the way you would tell it in the screenplay.

What do you think?

When new clues from the diary of her long lost brother, help a young woman to solve a riddle of decades old crime, she is compelled to go to Siberia in search for her vanished family and a missing treasure

This could be interesting but it is very vague and complicated. A lot of big words make it hard to follow and the characters i didn't find are very clear. Would this have a single protagonist or be an ensemble piece?

This could be interesting but it is very vague and complicated. A lot of big words make it hard to follow and the characters i didn't find are very clear. Would this have a single protagonist or be an ensemble piece?

Thank you for your suggestions and encouragment. Going back to try to make it better.

Your re-write is much better, I would try placing the inciting incident in the beginning of the longline, I believe it will fit better there... "After a man leaves her the diary of her long lost brother..."

I went to Amazon and read the reviews of you book, they are very positive, so it is just a matter of getting a logline as intriguing as the book.

Hope that helped.

Thank you again !!!! It really helps. I changed the log line to:
"A young women goes to Siberia to search for a missing treasure and her vanished family after a man leaves the diary of her long lost brother at her apartment."

The 'involuntary adventure' sounds like a passive MC who rather than takes action, is merely reacting. Personally, I would avoid this type of character - you want your MC to be the driving force.