When his lover is murdered during their routine work on a land deal, attorney and legal historian Charles Aden must penetrate a centuries old legal quagmire of lies and betrayal to bring her modern day killer to justice.

I think we're getting too caught up on the 75 minutes that I said :) I was using that just based on a 90 minute film ... yes, you're right, if it's for TV then it's gonna be a 45 minuter, and often features run at 120 or above.

The point I was trying to make is that once that setup occurs ... what am I watching for the rest of the run time, be it TV or feature? I hope it's not an attorney sifting through old paperwork.

Thanks nicholasandrewhalls.

I agree, this screenplay hinges on unique and well crafted execution. My goal is to develop a logline that clearly states the main story line. Selling this screenplay is likely to rely on backing up the logline with an excellent 60 second pitch.

Based on critiques from several sites, here is the latest revision.

When his lover is murdered during a land deal, an attorney must penetrate a centuries old quagmire of lies to bring her killer to justice.

Thanks again for your comments

"I think what he means is that the lawyer should be able to go through the entire situation in about 90 minutes. That?s simply not possible."

90 minutes of REEL time... not REAL time. 90 minutes is plenty of time (unless your the writer, then 90 min (or pages) is bloody hard.

:)

I think what he means is that the lawyer should be able to go through the entire situation in about 90 minutes. That's simply not possible.

It somewhat depends on the genre. Comedy genres are in the range of 90-105 minutes these days; more serious genres 110-120 minutes.

Actually, there is no need to be so literal about that. By that standard, your favorite hour long police procedural television series would have, say, around a half hour or so to work a case. It simply does not work that way. For example, NCIS is about 45 minutes or so an episode. That gives them about a half hour to run a case. However, if you watch an episode, you will see that it could span several days.

Well, because your standard feature is about 90 mins in length ... and once you've gone through the setup (usually about 15 mins before the catalyst occurs and kicks the story into gear) you've then got 75 mins left of that run time. It was short hand - I of course have no idea if that's what will actually happen in the script.

I would say that this is going to be execution dependant; it sounds like it could work, but the logline isn't making me jump out of my skin. Not certain what you could change though ...

Hi nicholasandrewhalls,

This is a detective story with a land deal at its center--that's why I chose an attorney instead of a cop or PI for the main character.

The police are involved as well due to the murder. The attorney gets involved not only because he wants to find his lover's killer but because the land deal is still in process. This story relies on reveals and surprises so playing the information the attorney gathers against the police investigation allows for multiple story lines to play out at the same time.

The heart of the story is the attorney interviewing the residents of the town where the land deal is being negotiated. They provide information on the past history of the town. He will dig through old documents as well but I don't think I could find a way to completely carry the plot with just that portion of the story.

Hope that is helpful.

Exactly 1.25 hours? Why that specific amount of time?

Stakes are interesting ... but the premise seems shaky to me (an attorney digs through land deeds and legal documents for 75 minutes). Is it a court room drama or a detective story?

Thanks for your comment leejay68. Is dpg's edit helpful?

Great edit dpg. Thanks.

When his lover is murdered during a seemingly routine land deal, an attorney discovers a history of legal entanglements involving the land that he must untangle to bring the killer to justice.

It sounds like Charles would be the number one suspect...like to see the character avoid that scenario.