When a german soldier deserts he come across a jewish family and together they try to flee the country while being hunted by german soldiers.

by storyutbildningen 0 pts

To be Hunted

5 reviews

wilsondownunder 1 pts

Hi,

I immediately identified with this being Nazi related though it wouldn't hurt to specify the fact. It's a good idea. I like it. I'd suggest reducgint the title to simply "Hunted" but up to you

good luck

Richiev Singularity · 82,714 pts

First I would say "After" instead of "when"

Second, this is a pretty solid logline, however if you could give the German soldier a ticking clock. Maybe a rondevu point he must reach in a specific time window, that'll help create more tension and conflict.

Finally I agree with kjk11's point, use "Nazi" instead of "German".

Good luck with this, nice idea. Hope that helped!

kjk11 0 pts

Maybe change "german soldier" to Nazis or the Gestapo to define time period and to create a more menacing protagonist.