Succesful lawer from Moscaw is obsessed with an american porn star, all attemts to meet her in person fail untill a brilliant idea comes to his mind to press charges against her.

Russian trip

5 reviews

Neer Shelter Singularity · 55,464 pts

I see.

I think the problem is you currently have 2 goals set out for the main character; professional success and a personal relationship.
Pick one and re draft the logline to focus on the chosen goal.

dpg Singularity · 112,231 pts

Okay, thanks for the clarification.? But for the purposes of the logline and the plot, what is his objective goal?? Is the porn star just a means to another end, a publicity gimmick to achieve his real purpose, his real objective goal?

If his real objective goal is professional success and recognition that's fine for plot but? it needs to be defined with a specific benchmark or achievement that certifies to the character (and the audience) that he has indeed achieved "professional success and recognition".?? In other words, what's the visual for "professional success and recognition".? What happens in that "success" ?scene?

Karel Segers Samurai · 615 pts

Thank you so much for the critique, now i see i got it wrong. So the story goes around a very ambisious lawer, who not only obsessed personally with the porn star but also seeking for professional success and recognision. So when the porn star arrives to Moscaw for a film shoot he uses his talent to find a way to put her in court not only to meet her but also to attract all media attention to provoke a scandal to get free advertizing.