An ambitious blogger lands a legit writing gig with a large publishing firm the only problem is her first story , the subject is a wealthy philanthropist with a surprising secret. ?His associates grow nervous about the nosy news lady uncovering potentially damaging information regarding financial improprieties. With a deadline closing in she discovers there is a bounty on her head.

A logline is a concise summary of the story in its entirety using (ideally) no more than 40 words phrased as a single sentence.

At 61 words and comprising of 3 sentences, I'd recommend checking out the Formula page (link in the top nav) or, better yet, try out the logline generator to help come up with a 1 sentence logline.

So she's been given a job writing a book(?) about a wealthy philanthropist. I'm guessing she doesn't have permission to do this? I feel like a book is a bit of a stretch and for a crime thriller (which I imagine this is) the shorter the time frame, the more potential you have for a thrill. Personally, I'd change her to be a journalist who uncovers a secret about the wealthy philanthropist she's doing a positive story about. Have it so that she was commissioned by the philanthropist (or their agent) to write a nice piece about all the good work this guy does in the community. The paper she works for is being paid a substantial amount of money and given exclusive access for this piece. When she uncovers this secret, she's caught between uncovering the truth - her natural instinct as a reporter - and the the knowledge that the paper will lose all that money and she may even lose her job. Dilemma. Then, as dpg said, MPR, she discovers she has a bounty on her head. So now she has to not only uncover the truth but also stay alive in order to do it.

As dpg also pointed out, the hook (the secret) is an important element and since it's likely to happen as part of Act I, we do need a little more information to understand the story as a whole. This secret has to be big enough to warrant her risking her life.

Hope this helps.

I am going to try to get to the core of what you wrote:

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"When an ambitious blogger is hired to investigate a reclusive billionaire, she finds his staff are as determined to protect their bosses secrets, as she is to get the story"?

At 61 words, the logline needs to be trimmed down by at least 1/3.? It both tells more than a logline reader wants to know about the plot -- and less than a logline reader needs to know about the plot.

The story hook is that, come to find out, there is a bounty on her head.? And I'm guessing that's the midpoint reversal (MPR) Big Reveal. Well, then what must she do?? What becomes her objective goal?

Also "a surprising secret" is the game ball -- and the logline hides it.? There are at least 10,001 surprising secrets in at least 10,001 movies.? What distinguishes the "surprising secret" in this story that makes it truly "surprising", different from the others.? The logline doesn't have to describe the secret in explicit detail, but a logline reader will want to be able to see the game ball, have a clear idea of what's in play.

I suggest running this through the site logline gnerator.