When his life unravels, a selfish, high school Jock is given a chance of redemption when he starts visualizing the desires of anyone he touches. p.s I’m trying something a bit different … 2 log lines based on the same premise. This one is a comeuppance tale of Jerk transformed to Good Guy. The next submission is Loser to Hero…. Your thoughts on both or either please. And which transformation do you prefer? which logline is the most ironic?

One more thing, you say he is given a chance at redemption... I would add who is it that gives him the chance for redemption in the logline.

This one seems to lack the plot-critical descriptions a logline needs.

As the others have said, what causes his life to unravel? How is that connected to him seeing other people's desires? What is his goal?

This logline has the least clear detail of all the many iterations you've posted so far.

I have to agree wit Dkpough1, you should be more specific on how his life unravels.

When he loses his scholarship
When he doesn't get into the college of his dreams.
When his girl dumps him at the prom

You don't have to describe every problem but give us a glimpse of his main problem in a few words, then connect it to what he must do.