?When a rookie undercover officer mistakenly finds himself admitted to a college that trains criminals, he will have to play a balancing act in order to please his superiors and prove he's one of the guys.?
Crime College (no title yet)
6 reviews
Perhaps,
?When a rookie undercover cop, mistakenly finds himself trapped in a college for criminals, he must balance his need to please his superiors, yet prove he's one of the guys.?
Your intentions of adding plot thickeners, in my mind, add confusion. Best to simplify it to a single clear sequence of events.
What is his single goal? What are the stakes? The notion of keeping some of his actions secret form some of the characters and some of not shouldn't be in the logline at all. Let that develop as a derivative of a well constructed plot in the outline or treatment.
Why doesn't he want to let the people whom he works for and with know he's enrolled?
What is the purpose of his "balancing act"; that is, what is his objective goal?
What's at stake: what does he stand to gain if he succeeds? What will he lose if he fails?
And what's the genre? A cop/crime comedy or a cop/crime drama?