?tittle:______ ? ? ? ?”The black?chines s” The black america rapper and ?university?student ?went?to ?china rural area with his?chines?girl?friend?and class mate ?in summer?break?straggle?to?adapt?culture and discept with her family and community and her?chine’s?ex boy?friend

by beki Logliner · 306 pts 512 views

5 reviews

dpg Singularity · 112,231 pts ★ Accepted

The logline sets up a very interesting situation for cultural and ethnic conflict.? But then what happens?? What is the plot that follows from the conflict.? As a result of the conflict, what must the Black rapper do?? What becomes his objective goal? (Why is he there to begin with?? Does he intend to marry the girl?)

What's at stake? He's only going to be there for a while,? right?? ?So as soon as he goes back to school, his dramatic problem is solved -- or is it?

fwiw

Neer Shelter Singularity · 55,464 pts

Richiev's version works well - I can see a plot from reading it as there will likely be multiple obstacles on his way to father approval each with its own unique culture clash and dramatic stake. That said if you had one big thing he had to do to get dear old dad's approval it would help focus the plot. What if he had to master Chines opera or Kung Fu or traditional Chinese painting?

beki Logliner · 306 pts

Yes the logline was overloaded