"SOMETIMES LOVE" Revised: A man with a checkered past determined to get his life back on track, falls for the woman who saves his life, but her drug addiction and past horrors may jeopardize everything he works for

Dramatic Love Story
-OR-
“Determined to get his life back on track, an ex-con falls for the woman who saves his life, but her demons may jeopardize everything he works for.”

5 reviews

uDawnWrite 0 pts

I think I have it.... but now I'm skurd to post it... lol! I work night shift; 12 hour shifts, and I worked all dang night. I took Karel's advice and studied and practice the logline techniques from this website, and I think I finally got it. Too bad "When a Man Loves a Woman" is taken because that is the title I would've chosen. ;)

joey 0 pts

Maybe this helps:

"Discovering her problems may be worse than his own, an ex-con second guesses falling for the woman who saved his life."

-Joey

uDawnWrite 0 pts

Well darn, I just can't win for losing.... (I'm not mad). His goal/premise/desire is to have a family... and I have it clearly SHOWN not told on page 4 of my script... that you are unaware of... I know. Again I'm not mad, just frustrated, trying to squeeze 120 min into 15-20 seconds... However, I'm beginning to grasp the concept a little in ref to inner vs outer goal... the outer is what I need to include in my logline... I'll keep at it. Lucky for me, I don't have to add a logline for the Scriptapalooza contest because I would be SOL. But structure... I have studied and practiced and studied some more... so I'm pretty confident with what should happen in the first 10 pages, 30 pages 45-60.. so forth, Twist in Act III, but this logline is kicking my arse. But anyways, I will spend several weeks playing around with mine and others.... practice makes perfect.... or at least better.... and I am grateful, Karel for the feedback... because no feedback, I would just assume it's okay. :)