An introverted teen with special powers seeks to avenge her family's killers and rescue others like her from slavery.

The Hiddens

5 reviews

CraigDGriffiths Singularity · 20,463 pts

I find the two goals a bit of a clash. They needed to feel more like a single story. Is one of them setting?

Karel Segers Samurai · 615 pts

Giaforetia, please continue this thread and don't post any revisions in new entries. I will delete the later entry.

The idea is to continue the discussion with the original logline and post your revisions in the COMMENTS.

Thank you! :)

Former member Penpusher · 20 pts

I changed the Logline it is now "an introverted teen with special powers comes home to her entire family executed and seeks to avenge their deaths and rescue others like her from slavery"