4 reviews
Agree with the above reviews. My main question was, why does the protag want to stop his friend become a famous rapper and how does posing as an aspiring actor allow him to infiltrate the organisation?
Agreed with DPG.
There is a problem in the concept of this logline, but otherwise it is too long, contains too many details and the character flaw (ego driven) is introduced only at the end. Best to describe the main character and his or her flaw at the beginning of a logline, this way the reader can clearly see how the MC's characteristic will influence the action during the read.
And why would the Illuminati want to promote?a ?rapper?? Or admit to its secret councils an aspiring actor??? How did their standards get so low that they would admit characters like these? What's in it for them??? Isn't the organization?supposed to be focused on conspiracies for??world domination, not entertainment.
Okay, it's a comedy, and comedies can play loose with fact -- and fiction -- but still, there has to be some sense of plausibility,?some credible?cause-and-effect.?? Others' mileage may vary, but I don't see the point or the connections.
fwiw
Why would he want to stop his friend from becoming a famous rapper?