After an estranged middle-aged son loses his mother to a fatal accident, he embarks on a mission to spread her ashes, with his “slow” step-brother in tow, against the family’s wishes.

by Castler Media Samurai · 589 pts 0 views

With his life crumbling all around him — looming divorce, estranged daughter, unsteady job, borderline alcoholic — his family’s blatant disregard for Mama’s post-mortem wishes is the final straw. He breaks into the mausoleum, steals the urn, and prepares for a hasty cross-country road trip to spread her ashes… but not before being blackmailed into taking his “slow” step-brother along for the ride, who teaches him the importance of family.

9 reviews

Castler Media Samurai · 589 pts

That's the plan, Odie. :)

The conflict, Richiev, will be found in the active pursuit and entrapment by the family, in phone interactions with his his estranged wife, and in placating / connecting with the "slow" step-brother.

Odie Samurai · 2,208 pts

Yes, I want to see the family “Karen” hot on his heels and hellbent on stopping him 😉
At OP - A destination is key for reader orientation.

Richiev Singularity · 82,714 pts

Story is conflict. What is the conflict of finding a place to spread the ashes? And if that conflict is the family, how can that conflict happen if they are away?

Richiev Singularity · 82,714 pts

"After his mother's death, the family Blacksheep is tasked with the dying wish to spread her ashes despite pushback from the family and his mentally handicapable brother in tow."

(Perhaps bring the family along in the car for conflict)

Castler Media Samurai · 589 pts

Daughter -- she's only 6. Anger with her father would manifest more as fear of him, if at all. She's old enough to realize she no longer lives with daddy, young enough that nobody wants to explain it to her.

Step-brother -- Not quite "Rain Man," but more than just your average idiot. My co-writer and I still need to determine if this was a "born this way" scenario, or maybe the result of an accident.