After a terror attack, the highly decorated FBI lead investigator finds his only son was the mastermind. He must choose between giving up his son or protecting him

3 reviews

Neer Shelter Singularity · 55,464 pts

The main character's dilemma is interesting, but should be understood from the plot instead of being literally spelled out.

For example:
After a decorated FBI agent discovers his son masterminded a terror attack, he must stop his next planned attack at all costs.

dpg Singularity · 112,231 pts

The logline sets up a situation -- but, alas,? not a plot.? Unless the plot is that after the father discovers at the end of Act 1 that his son masterminded a terror attack, he agonizes for the next 60 + pages/minutes? over what to do about it.? The plot is all about him not being able to make up his mind until Act 3.? How exciting is that?

Or is it the more likely scenario that after he finds out, events will compel him to quickly decide what to do at the start of Act 2?? So what must he urgently decide to do when he finds out -- and what are the consequences that follow?