EDITED: A bored flight attendant?s life is turned upside down when she is mistaken for the accomplice of one of her passengers, a charming thief on the run from the mob

3 reviews

steveylang Samurai · 1,145 pts

When a naive flight attendant gets mixed up with one of her passengers, a charming grifter on the run from the mob, she...

I like the set up, but we are only getting the set up. Finish the logline and tell us what happens.

dpg Singularity · 112,231 pts

What becomes her objective goal as a result of the relationship? ?What is the dramatic question the rest of the story must eventually answer?

Richiev Singularity · 82,714 pts

This logline is way to vague to grip the reader.

First; a protagonist should be pro-active. You have not given your lead character a goal.

Second; I have know idea what, 'gets mixed up with' actually means. Is there a specific scam? If so it should be in the logline.

Because of these two things I don't have a clear understanding of what the story would actually be about.