A mysterious boy is on the run after having his identity discovered. But will he escape from the prospect of the hunters chasing him every second.

the chase

6 reviews

Richiev Singularity · 82,714 pts

The plot is set into motion when his identity is discovered, you should tell us what that identity is, if it's such an important plot point.

Davron Penpusher · 1 pts

This is an interesting idea, needs to be a bit clearer with what is going to happen, also needs something fresh that'll make it stand out.

Neer Shelter Singularity · 55,464 pts

What DPG said.

Also the idea of a logline is to part with the perfect amount of information to explain the plot and ideally create intrigue. The intrigue part can come about by keeping certain elements descriptions vague but in this case there is too many too vague descriptions and not enough information provided.
Therefore the questions above.

Hope this helps.