Trix

Samurai · 2,991 points

7,009 points to Overlord

4 loglines
63 reviews

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Samurai

Loglines

A 19-year-old must bomb an LGBT community centre to re-enter her familial cult and free the secretly gay younger sister she failed to escape with one year earlier.

March 20, 2020
LINK BELOW. ?Recent BBC article may make great ‘based on true events’ film: North Korea. ?Prison guard helps female detainee escape and cross Chinese border. ?He’s disillusioned as his low-caste and financial status thwart ambition of being a police officer. She was imprisoned before for smuggling cash & phone calls out of NK. ?Husband remarried and took their 2 kids away. ?Now she’ll be sent to a death camp. ?SO many possibilities!

February 25, 2020
When a hexed cat?s paw infects a browbeaten teenager with volatile supernatural abilities, her only hope of purging the infection is a ragtag coven, but when they teach her some control of the power by improving her self-esteem, she goes rogue to exact revenge on her tormentors.

February 7, 2020
1

404 page error – when using the search box and when trying to move past the first page of someone’s loglines. Is it only me?

January 15, 2020

Recent reviews

on Hounded by debt collectors, a brassy small-time hustler solves her money woes by becoming a debt collector herself.

Hi dpg, I've not seen the film, but your logline looks totally solid. ?Being devil's advocate, could you get rid of "Hounded by debt collectors" and replace "money woes" with something that sums the debt collectors up? ?Not that it…
on When a visiting dignitary is murdered, the na?ve youngest prince of a fairy-tale kingdom becomes the Watson to a Holmes-like detective. But, when the detective is also killed, the prince must solve the mystery on his own before the situation escalates into all-out war.

Hi Todd, Sorry, I missed your MPR on my first read (not because it wasn't clear, just because I must have been only 1 coffee down that morning! LOL)... totally understandable for a longer logline with an MPR. ?Having said…
on When a visiting dignitary is murdered, the na?ve youngest prince of a fairy-tale kingdom becomes the Watson to a Holmes-like detective. But, when the detective is also killed, the prince must solve the mystery on his own before the situation escalates into all-out war.

HI Todd, I like the unusual idea of a murder mystery being set in a fairy tale kingdom. ?Are you going to subvert the norms of 'fairy tale' or do you actually mean fantasy kingdom? ?My initial thoughts are: Watson…
on An emotionally-stunted, apathetic playboy learns to grieve his father’s death and appreciate life from a terminally ill woman, who loves life.

Hi DH, dpg is right, this needs some specifics for what we'll see on screen. ?I immediately saw the playboy having to return to his place of birth and sort his father's affairs and being totally sidelined by the woman…
on Disillusioned with Hollywood, a movie star returns to her Midwest hometown to attend her high school reunion – only to reignite old flames, rivalries and loves.

Hi DH,Ultimately I think you should write the film YOU want to. ? If that?s an internal objective, so be it ? being told you can?t do that is BS. ?I suppose what they are saying is that the logline…
on With the help of his undead lost love, a reluctant store manager must return to the island where she was slain to prevent the escape of a primitive evil before the anniversary of her death. ★ Accepted

Hi Odie, I like the idea - and that you have a hero fighting for a dead love. ?I think Nir is right, you need some more clarity between the elements in this logline, or, reading your response to guswakey,…
on A smart but directionless food delivery boy is mistakenly given the kiss of death from a psychotic gangster and must outwit the mob in order to survive and get his life back on track

Hi guswakey, I really like your premise - I can totally see it playing out for comedic value. ?I think Craig has pretty much knocked this on the head, and your second logline reads so much better. ? I'm thinking…
on A very old and dying president, A secret services chief and the commander chief of the military of a dictatorship gathered in secrecy to discuss the future of the country and the matters of power succesion. They will come to realize that schemes and plots are at play and they don’t share the same vision of how a governement should be

Hi AO31, It reads like you're still working through an idea here... there is a potential clash of objectives but as Richiev has asked, who are we following? ?Why? ?What for? ?It's hard to comment on it as it stands…
on After mythology’s most vicious monsters and history’s most heinous criminals escape from hell, a neurotic college-sophomore finds herself imbued with the power to send these evildoers back from whence they came. ★ Accepted

Hi JBalmer,I like your premise - this kind of thing is right up my street, definitely something I'd watch as a TV show or a film. ?My initial thoughts are:I feel like you have 2 inciting incidents? ?1) the evildoers…
on When a high-flying stockbroker with ADHD is charged with insider-trading, he battles to prove his sanity to a disbelieving Court and that the disease caused his lawlessness.

Hi Leon, I was intrigued by your logline, but I'll be honest, not as it stands with ADHD/sanity/disease teamed together. ?Here's what it made me think: Whilst ADHD isn't the first thing that springs to my mind for a high…
on 1960 (USA) Two criminals parked roadside, one black, one white, they wait for money to be picked up, but a battle of wits breaks out resulting in one being shot and the money disappearing.

I like the premise of your story - I also think your argument/theme posed about justified 'badness' and maybe levels of badness (I'm a thief but at least I'm not a murderer, I'm a murderer but at least I'm not…
on A former child actor’s life has turned upside down when he mentors a teenage boy who looks like him during his younger days.

I'm not sure why you had drug dealer in the first place... why would seeing someone who looks like his younger self turn his life upside down?I realise you've changed it to 'former child actor' but this is such an…
on When a high priced gigolo moonlights as a pornstar, his sexual depravities reach extreme heights, and he is forced to decide how much of his soul he will sell for money, fame and the love that will never fulfil him.

I agree with dpg, bringing this into the modern day and presenting a porn actor whose star is waning and struggling to maintain his lifestyle is a more interesting (to me) story. This could be closer to your 'toxic masculinity'…
on 1960 (USA) Two criminals parked roadside, one black, one white, they wait for money to be picked up, but a battle of wits breaks out resulting in one being shot and the money disappearing.

Hi Craig, Your logline led to a few questions in my mind: 1960s USA - Is there a specific reason this is stated? ?Couldn't this be any time and any place? ?What specifically makes is a period USA piece? "criminals"…
on When a playboy becomes entangled with a set of polyamorous, jet-setting nomads – he falls in love with an unavailable woman, whilst a suicidal nubile teen, falls madly in love with him.

The more I hear about it, the more I like the idea... especially the asthetic - I would add that to the logline. I would focus on the couple at the heart of it - the playboy and the married…
on When a playboy becomes entangled with a set of polyamorous, jet-setting nomads – he falls in love with an unavailable woman, whilst a suicidal nubile teen, falls madly in love with him.

Wow - you do have a lot going on! ?I feel like I'd get an STI just reading that logline! LOL I think it has legs as an idea... Are the jet-setting nomads a group? Or are they just like-minded…
on A disgraced mecha pilot searches for a cure to his ailing health against the government’s wishes. As he reunites his former comrades and combats pursuing government agents, he discovers the rogue AI responsible for his condition, and must stop it before its plans to “purify” the world come to fruition.

Hi PyroPanda, I can instantly see the film you're describing which is a great thing... I just think you have squeezed too much into your logline - it reads more like a mini synopsis than the core of your idea.…
on ?When her husband tragically dies, a depressed young widow honors his last wish to pass along his sacred heirloom to their firstborn son; otherwise, a generation of blessings will turn to generations of curses. But after a ruthless adversary steals the heirloom, ?the widow struggles to retrieve it before an evil curse is brought upon her son.

Hi Melissa, Did you update the logline? ?I'm wondering if a sentence was tagged on after dpg's questions? ? My suggestions are: Delete "when her husband tragically dies" - You don't need this as you have a depressed young widow…
on After a heated fallout with her former band mate, a determined singer signs a deal with a ruthless CEO unknowingly in the gangster lifestyle, who fills her head with promises and solo stardom, as she forms a greed dictated rivalry with her formal partner that culminates to tragedy.

Hi Keymiser, To me your logline reads more like a complete rundown of the film - you've kind of given us a step by step overview. The rivalry seems the most interesting part of the story for me. "after a…
on Two directionless twenty-something bartenders are accidentally exposed to information about a fixed horse race and try to take advantage of this potential windfall without tipping their hand to the nasty thugs that planned the caper

I don't know where my head is today, but your logline reminded me of Connie and Carla https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0345074/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1?! Mike hits the nail on the head here with "what else sustains the 90min+ runtime" and "this is simply the tip of…