Finding that the term for several lesbian vampires is a 'bed'. Going to Pornithian House, the Lesbian Vampires Hunters and friends go to rid the bed of lesbian vampires from the house of Porn.

Karel Segers,
Yes, your comments were helpful.

By leaving out the 'bed' and trying to make the logline simpler, I'd be left with.
The Lesbian Vampire Hunters go to Pornithian House, to rid the lesbian vampires from the House of Porn.
Does that read better than it was?

If you need to explain the joke, don't tell it.
By "Don't confuse the logline for the script" I meant that Wereviking was judging your script before you had a good logline. You may well have a script that is better than Vampires Suck but Wereviking cannot possibly know this before your logline is perfect. Then, he may want to check the script for himself.

I think you're right about challenging yourself to do better than the movies you see in the theater. Any inspiration is good to get you going!

Don't leave out humour from the logline but keep it simple, so you don't have to explain it.

First of all, make sure you have a logline that clearly conveys the core story/concept elements PLUS what is unique to your story.

I hope this is helpful.

Wereviking,
I take it you didn't like LVK.
Karel Segers,
use of the term 'bed' was used to highlight the humour of the story.
When you stated, 'Don't confuse the logline for the script', what does that refer to?
The script was only written after watching the film Vampires Suck. I thought, maybe I could do better.
I sought to say what the film's story is, and add humour into the logline to accentuate the use of humour in the story. Do you consider it preferable to leave out any attempt at humour and keep to the storyline?