When the most sought after celebrity becomes a widow, a beauty underdog beats the odds to marry him after unwittingly impersonating royalty and struggles to conceal her secret from the media.

3 reviews

Jean-Marie Mazaleyrat Samurai · 767 pts

Hello Karel

You're right. ?By the way, the story is mostly about the struggle to get married. I fix?this.

Former member

Sounds a bit messy to me...

Try rewording it, using the formula I recommend here:?https://loglines.org/howto.

The story lacks in Inciting Incident, unless the marriage is accidental...

Typically, a great story starts with something that happens to the main character. Not something the main character does.

It seems to me that the struggle to get married is more interesting than the struggle to keep the secret. Or perhaps I just don't get it...

Happy rewriting!

 

Karel

Former member

Sounds a bit messy to me...

Try rewording it, using the formula I recommend here:?https://staging.loglineit.com/howto.

The story lacks in Inciting Incident, unless the marriage is accidental...

Typically, a great story starts with something that happens to the main character. Not something the main character does.

It seems to me that the struggle to get married is more interesting than the struggle to keep the secret. Or perhaps I just don't get it...

Happy rewriting!

 

Karel