Garrett

Initiate · 62 points

38 points to Logliner

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on When the sole survivor of a destroyed lifeboat is pulled aboard a sinking luxury liner, he is plunged into further chaos as the crew begins to abandon the doomed passengers of the SS Arctic.

Hi dogger, Thanks for making me aware of the clarity issue, which is significant as the ship collision proceeding this event is indeed the inciting incident of the film. As the current version of this logline is currently for my…
on When the sole survivor of a destroyed lifeboat is pulled aboard a sinking luxury liner, he is plunged into further chaos as the crew begins to abandon the doomed passengers of the SS Arctic.

Hi Karel, The character action is vague at the moment for two reasons: one, the story follows multiple points of view and I had trouble writing an interesting logline from an ensemble-like perspective; two, I focused on the irony of…
on An idealistic professor secretly trains medical undergrads at an illegal Beijing clinic for the underserved, but CCP scrutiny looms everywhere, turning every patient and wrong decision into a potential death sentence.

This is actually an interesting premise, but I would somewhat advise against writing unfavourably of the CCP out of caution. It's less about your own safety, rather it is (in my opinion) quite an unmarketable premise because not many producers…
on Over three decades, Lucy passes through innocence, violent delusion, tenderness, and ultimately grace – fractured versions of a soul struggling to survive a world that continually misreads her.

Apologies for being so negatively focused in this review, hopefully I can point out some things to help you edit your logline. I'll breakdown your logline into chunks and make comments on each part. "Over three decades..." If the story…