3 reviews
Hi Drew,
Maybe instead of just being vaguely "skeptical", the protagonist should be described as becoming dissalusioned with his dream job after endless abduction stories.
Perhaps his wife mysteriously dissapears but he doesn't actually witness the abduction. Then, on wit's end, a strange patient sets him on a path that gradually changes his mind and leads to the truth.
Hello and thank you very much for you time and notes. I am taking them on board and will update asap.
I like this.
I think "skeptic" might not be the right choice for his characteristic. Only because it's resolved as soon as he witnesses his wife's abduction. Chances are, within the first 15 mins or so, this arc is completed.
I'd kinda like the goal to be expanded on a little. I'd like to know more specifics about how they're planning on getting her back. Maybe his abductee patient has a set of skills? I'd just like to be able to visualise their actions in Act II a little more.
Looking forward to seeing where this goes.
Hope this helps.