Awakened memories of childhood abuse drive a rising young executive on an obsession of discovery and revenge that takes him to the brink of self-destruction.

Ugly Justice

3 reviews

AHStitt 95 pts

Thanks guys. Can make the goal clearer (diverted from career into revenging a childhood friend). There is redemption in the story (Justice achieved, self-destruction averted, a happy life in prospect) but with a dark tinge. I'll tinker.

FYI it is a second re-write that's currently being critiqued by my script consultant.

"Ugly awakened memories drive a rising young executive to the brink of self-destruction in an obsession to avenge the abuse of his childhood best friend"

LS Richards 0 pts

Could work as a tour-de-force role for an A-Lister: "Flight" comes to mind. But yes, needs that note of redemption.

dpg 112,231 pts

A logline should be about a protagonists objective goal. What the executive's objective goal?

If there is one factor that in my mind makes your other logline about the woman dying of cancer more appealing than this one it is that her story line is proactive and forward looking. In contrast, the executive's story line is reactive and backward looking. He's bouncing off his traumatic past, negatively; she's struggling for the future, positively.

She has a worthwhile goal. Which gives me, as a member of audience, something specific to root for her, a goal I hope she achieves. But the executive? Why should I root for him? What, specifically, is there in the logline for me to root for, to hope he achieves?

When I ask what is his objective goal, I am asking: despite his past problems, and present character flaws, what is he struggling to accomplish in the future?

fwiw.