JinniaFlyer450

Recent reviews

• on After giving a tape showing a ritual killing to a deputy. Both the tape and the deputy go missing. When he finds more tapes he needs to get them to the police and survive attacks from unknown individuals. PS: small town, he thinks the cops are involved.

  Note: I am by no means a professional, so I'm a little unsure of myself, but the first thing I would suggest is to make it flow a little more. The way you split it into sentences makes it choppy.?…

• on After a popular police officer is suspended indefinitely for shooting a black teen, a desk duty officer seizes his opportunity to be a hero, serving as his town’s only source of law enforcement when the rest of the police force protests by calling in “sick” for a week.

  This idea strikes me as really cool on the one hand, but on the other, I could see you getting into a lot of trouble with it, especially because this reads more like a comedy to me than a drama.…

• on A woman decides to sabotage her best friend’s wedding when she realizes her former fiance is proposing to her.

  Agreed with most of the above; I understand that the first "her" is the woman and the second "her" is the best friend, but it needs to be made more obvious.