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  1. Posted: April 10, 2018In: Thriller

    When a female editor working overnight with her careerist cameraman discovers he’s the perpetrator in his acquired murder footage, she must safely evacuate the studio

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on April 10, 2018 at 7:07 am

    variable: I think you have an intriguing story idea.? I suggest you expand the setting and time frame.? That is, make her a studio producer who becomes suspicious after time and again he's the one who gets the scoop, who's always the first on the scene.???"Nightcrawler" meets "American Psycho". fwiwRead more

    variable:

    I think you have an intriguing story idea.? I suggest you expand the setting and time frame.? That is, make her a studio producer who becomes suspicious after time and again he’s the one who gets the scoop, who’s always the first on the scene.???”Nightcrawler” meets “American Psycho”.

    fwiw

     

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  2. Posted: April 8, 2018In: Thriller

    A vengeful young woman with a grudge about being conceived by anonymous sperm donation tracks down her biological father, who is now a successful gynaecologist, and plots with her scheming mother to take the place of his wife and daughter.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on April 9, 2018 at 10:30 pm

    A protagonist doesn't' have to be sympathetic.? But she has to be interesting.? ?The character has to draw you into her world, her wild and crazy pov.??I? suggest that the character in this story be described for what she is, that your logline be an invitation for a script reader to go on a journeyRead more

    A protagonist doesn’t’ have to be sympathetic.? But she has to be interesting.? ?The character has to draw you into her world, her wild and crazy pov.??I? suggest that the character in this story be described for what she is, that your logline be an invitation for a script reader to go on a journey into a heart of darkness of a psychopath.

    My first response was to try to normalize the story — hence, I tilted toward reworking it from the victim’s point of view.? But if you? are intent on telling? with her as the protagonist, then I think any attempt to normalize the story would only dilute the character.? ?What made “America Psycho” so? compelling is that? the story is told entirely from the pov of the psycho.? We enter his mind, his custom styled insane asylum.

    fwiw

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  3. Posted: April 6, 2018In: Thriller

    Revision: When a timid, undocumented student gets abducted, she must find the courage to escape a bleak island with four other strangers who aren’t all who they seem.

    variable Uberwriter
    Added an answer on April 9, 2018 at 7:16 pm

    dpg is right, If your answer to "...was she abducted because she was undocumented?..." Is NO, then drop it from the logline Other than that, it should not contain "she must find the courage to..." even if you describe her as "timid" Your goal MUST be front and center

    dpg is right,
    If your answer to “…was she abducted because she was undocumented?…” Is NO, then drop it from the logline

    Other than that, it should not contain “she must find the courage to…” even if you describe her as “timid” Your goal MUST be front and center

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