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A soon-to-be heiress must overcome her atheism to make amends for her father’s past to inherit his fortune, but when Satan intervenes, it becomes a fight for her future.
Atheism isn't a flaw to be overcome. It would make more sense to describe her as a skeptic. Other than that, like Nir mentioned, it's a hot mess of story elements that don't easy form a coherent story.
Atheism isn’t a flaw to be overcome. It would make more sense to describe her as a skeptic.
Other than that, like Nir mentioned, it’s a hot mess of story elements that don’t easy form a coherent story.
See lessAfter a supernatural creature slaughtered his family and a handful of other people 15 years ago at his Nevadan hometown, Roland Fisher, sets off once again to find the truth when the same incident occurs yet again, leaving one boy survivor in the creature?s trail of murder.
Why a town in? Nevada?? Is there a connection with Area 51?
Why a town in? Nevada?? Is there a connection with Area 51?
See lessPossessed by an angel, a reclusive student is forced to track down the host of an escaped demon and exorcise it before he becomes its next victim.
It sounds like the MC is the angel and the logline should be told form his or her point of view. The angel can still take control of the students body but the story is the angel's not the student's. What is the big danger posed by the demon outside of the that to the person he or she is possessing?Read more
It sounds like the MC is the angel and the logline should be told form his or her point of view. The angel can still take control of the students body but the story is the angel’s not the student’s.
What is the big danger posed by the demon outside of the that to the person he or she is possessing? Is there a greater good the angel is fighting for than one human? Could the demon be trying to bring about the Apocalypse for example?
I think the stakes need raising significantly and an inciting incident needs to be specified.
Hope this helps.
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