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When intruders break into her home, the ghost of a paraplegic must save her unsuspecting husband from the intruders? sinister plan that involves planting venomous snakes in the husband?s closet.
It wold be better if the logline described the intruders as the ones responsible for her death, then much like in Ghost the stakes are frighteningly plausible.
It wold be better if the logline described the intruders as the ones responsible for her death, then much like in Ghost the stakes are frighteningly plausible.
See lessWhen Emma discovers that her suave seducer is planning to kill her, she must escape his isolated mountain lodge and track across treacherous terrain while he hunts her down.
This is a pretty well written logline. There's a goal and high steaks. I understand how the story's going to work and the genre. My only question is about Emma. We don't usually need a name in loglines, so I'd recommend replacing the proper name with a descriptor. What kind of a girl is Emma? ThinkiRead more
This is a pretty well written logline. There’s a goal and high steaks. I understand how the story’s going to work and the genre.
My only question is about Emma. We don’t usually need a name in loglines, so I’d recommend replacing the proper name with a descriptor. What kind of a girl is Emma? Thinking about how an experience like this would change a person may lead you to an interesting character. What is someone going to learn from surviving, or even just being put into, this kind of a situation? Is she a shy girl, the polar opposite of a suave seducer, or a bit of a party animal?
Again, this is super good. Addressing that one note may be all you need to solidify the concept.
See lessWhen intruders break into her home, the ghost of a paraplegic must save her unsuspecting husband from the intruders’ sinister plan that involves planting venomous snakes in the husband’s closet.
Per FFF: >>>And no idea of what kind of interactions a ghost can have with the intruders. Neither do I. If the ghost has any capacity to? interact with the material world, why doesn't she?deal with the snakes herself?? Or the intruders?? End of problem. If she doesn't have the capacity, theRead more
Per FFF:
>>>And no idea of what kind of interactions a ghost can have with the intruders.
Neither do I. If the ghost has any capacity to? interact with the material world, why doesn’t she?deal with the snakes herself?? Or the intruders?? End of problem.
If she doesn’t have the capacity, then how can she possibly save her husband?
What are the rules of engagement?
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