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Sharp, an obsessive abolitionist, fights against the English Establishment for the ending of slavery. His legal victory ensures the release of a black slave in London, starting the abolition of slavery in the British Empire.
Yes, an interesting subject. As a logline, I would cut the ending. Focus on the main character's jurney, find his flaw. ?"the abolition of slavery in the British Empire" will be just a tilescreen at the end of the movie. ?Maybe you can pick a clear individual antagonist to represent the 'establishmeRead more
Yes, an interesting subject. As a logline, I would cut the ending. Focus on the main character’s jurney, find his flaw. ?”the abolition of slavery in the British Empire” will be just a tilescreen at the end of the movie. ?Maybe you can pick a clear individual antagonist to represent the ‘establishment’. In my opinion, the strenght of this kind of biopic depends on the writer’s ability to create?a universal portrait of a man strugglig for his cause, rather that educating the masses to historical facts.
See lessA tough social worker takes fighting women’s rights into her own hands but can she put her cultural, religious and family obligations aside to fight for herself.
Whatever she's fighting for is vaguely defined. What is the specific issue she must confront? ? How does ?cultural, religious and personal obligations translate into a specific problem that necessitates a specific objective goal in order to resolve?
Whatever she’s fighting for is vaguely defined. What is the specific issue she must confront? ? How does ?cultural, religious and personal obligations translate into a specific problem that necessitates a specific objective goal in order to resolve?
See lessTo escape physiological torture, a teenager who got ?rescued? from his abusive mother, rallies the other students at his new school against the torturer, the headmistress, by deliberately bending and stretching the rules.
The loglein uses too many vague descriptions and lacks detail therefore?the plot isn't?clear. What was the specific event that made the student need to take action? Was he beaten? Was his only friend put in hospital or killed? As it is now the logline lacks the starting point for the story, best toRead more
The loglein uses too many vague descriptions and lacks detail therefore?the plot isn’t?clear.
What was the specific event that made the student need to take action? Was he beaten? Was his only friend put in hospital or killed?
As it is now the logline lacks the starting point for the story, best to describe an?inciting incident than describe a situation.
Secondly the goal is not clear. What does rally student against the headmistress mean? Will they tell the police about her? Will they trap her in her office? What will they do?
What does “…bending and stretching the rules?” mean in specific terms? What action will they actually take to achieve their goal?
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