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An amnesiac woman and her son reconstruct the past 15 years of her life, unaware of a murder investigation closing in on her.
The first half of your logline is clear and concise (well done!), the second half is indeed a surprising turn - perhaps more allusion to their relationship might make your logline scan a little better? Otherwise, I think this would be very interesting to play with...
The first half of your logline is clear and concise (well done!), the second half is indeed a surprising turn – perhaps more allusion to their relationship might make your logline scan a little better? Otherwise, I think this would be very interesting to play with…
See lessLosing hope she?ll be rescued, a brutally assaulted young woman despairs over ?what ifs? and seeks peace for all that will never be in the moments before her death.
Deanna:In ?my personal, very subjective, and very conceited (what's that you say, you noticed?) opinion, you're short film would make a great 1st Act to set up a more compelling story. ?She has?all these regrets, acknowledges all her mistakes, make all these if-only resolutions/prayers/promises, makRead more
Deanna:
In ?my personal, very subjective, and very conceited (what’s that you say, you noticed?) opinion, you’re short film would make a great 1st Act to set up a more compelling story. ?She has?all these regrets, acknowledges all her mistakes, make all these if-only resolutions/prayers/promises, makes her peace with dying. passes out… end of Act 1.
Act 2: ? She comes to in an intensive care ward. ?She’s been rescued just in time. ?She recovers… slowly, but she recovers. ?Now comes the hard part: ?fulfilling her promises to herself, her vows to God.
In my personal, very subjective, and very conceited opinion, dying is the easy ending. ? All your character has to do ?– can do– is… absolutely nothing. ?Living, on the other hand, ?is hard. ?Hard work for the character. ?And, yes, hard work for you as the writer. ?But also, imho, the effort could lead to a more compelling story about your character and a more promising future for yourself.
Whatever. ?It’s your vision, your story. ?Best wishes with your writing.
fwiw
See lessWhen a man discovers his girlfriend?s heinous secret, he?s forced to turn her in before she strikes again. He creates an elaborate scheme centered around a romantic dinner, but realizes that she?s always a step ahead of him.
What do you conceive to be the hook of your story? And what is the inciting incident that kicks off the plot-- becoming the prime suspect or the kidnapping of his niece?
What do you conceive to be the hook of your story?
And what is the inciting incident that kicks off the plot– becoming the prime suspect or the kidnapping of his niece?
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