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  1. Posted: April 9, 2018In: Drama

    Does my logline work, is it clear and show the character, event, and action.

    Best Answer
    Valentin Samurai
    Added an answer on April 9, 2018 at 11:23 am

    When she ordered by a judge to move in with her estranged father and his family in Bel-Air, a street wise black teenager girl from the ghetto must overcome prejudice and ignorant stereotypes.I might be wrong, but to me Compton California is more ghetto than suburbia. I like the idea that a judge onRead more

    When she ordered by a judge to move in with her estranged father and his family in Bel-Air, a street wise black teenager girl from the ghetto must overcome prejudice and ignorant stereotypes.

    I might be wrong, but to me Compton California is more ghetto than suburbia.
    I like the idea that a judge on the recommendation of DCS is forcing both the teenager and the estranged /absent father to forge a new relationship.

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  2. Posted: April 7, 2018In: Drama

    Patrick, who has struggled with the demon dyslexia all his life, finds himself at crossroads when he meets a young gang member who is trapped in the same vicious cycle.

    obie1jonobi Logliner
    Added an answer on April 7, 2018 at 6:47 pm

    While it's good that you have a name for the character, it does little to describe the character to the audience. How has struggling with dyslexia affected him as an individual? How does it affect his interactions with others? Beyond that, the protagonist needs an action. He needs something to do.

    While it’s good that you have a name for the character, it does little to describe the character to the audience. How has struggling with dyslexia affected him as an individual? How does it affect his interactions with others?

    Beyond that, the protagonist needs an action. He needs something to do.

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  3. Posted: April 7, 2018In: Drama

    Based on Actual Events: Guilty of accidentally killing a black postal worker, a tobacco salesman politically awakens after his acquittal by a white court in Apartheid South Africa and joins a resistance group only to be caught, tortured and exiled for planning a terrorist attack against the regime.

    Shizz Penpusher
    Added an answer on April 7, 2018 at 4:12 pm

    Yep, good comments - the missing point here is that the protagonist was actually guilty of manslaughter

    Yep, good comments – the missing point here is that the protagonist was actually guilty of manslaughter

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