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When her disapproving friends conspire to end her pregnancy to a straight man, a cocksure lesbian must go to any extreme to keep the baby.
Unless this is a story set in?a stone age culture?( like decades ago when such pregnancies would have been controversial, verboten)? ?I don't see what the? potential for the concept is.? In the context of more tolerant times, hasn't it become a non-issue?? Why do?her friends?believe they must?take aRead more
Unless this is a story set in?a stone age culture?( like decades ago when such pregnancies would have been controversial, verboten)? ?I don’t see what the? potential for the concept is.? In the context of more tolerant times, hasn’t it become a non-issue??
Why do?her friends?believe they must?take away her?baby?? Just because she’s headstrong? That would seem to be?a character strength in this situation; she’s a determined woman.
fwiw
See lessThe most famous serial killer of the year has gotten very lonely. Wishing to have a friend who would accept him, joins a support group with very different and grotesque addicted people. One of those people is an overworked Agent who is part of a case to catch the most famous serial killer of the year.
I think the main character needs a clear end-goal. As it is now, the only goal presented in the logline is "to find a friend", but as far as I understand it, he finds that early on in the movie (when he joins the group). He also needs a main action, something he must do to reach his goal. Maybe he nRead more
I think the main character needs a clear end-goal. As it is now, the only goal presented in the logline is “to find a friend”, but as far as I understand it, he finds that early on in the movie (when he joins the group). He also needs a main action, something he must do to reach his goal. Maybe he needs to cover his tracks before before the Agent finds out he is the killer, in order to keep him/her as his friend?
Also, this logline could be boiled down to a shorter one. Including the main action and the goal, maybe something more like this:
“When a lonly serial killer joins a support group and take intrest in an other member, an overworked agent who is assigned to solve the murders he commited, he must cover his tracks before she finds out he is guilty in order to keep her as a friend.”
Hope this helped 🙂
See lesswhen a dog savagely bites the hand of a colleague of a young vet; she must reattach it in order to save his life.
Hello Wheelsonfire,Try this (22 words): "When a dog savagely bites the hand of a?colleague,?a young vet must reattach it in order to save his life."I agree with FFF. This seems very little to sustain a 90 minutes action/comedy movie. Hand bites are hardly ever lethal, and the tone suggests more a drRead more
Hello Wheelsonfire,
Try this (22 words):
“When a dog savagely bites the hand of a?colleague,?a young vet must reattach it in order to save his life.”
I agree with FFF. This seems very little to sustain a 90 minutes action/comedy movie. Hand bites are hardly ever lethal, and the tone suggests more a drama than a comedy…
I assume that many funny things happen, the hand bite issue being mostly the inciting incident or the backdrop of the story. ?IMO, this is what is missing in your logline. It tells not enough about your story.
Best.
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