Greg Derochie

0 points

1 points to Penpusher

1 logline
7 reviews

A man with no memory is trapped in a mysterious hotel, controlled by an oppressive host who forces him to to catch a killer among the guests in exchange for the truth of his identity.

August 14, 2013

on A man with no memory is trapped in a mysterious hotel, controlled by an oppressive host who forces him to to catch a killer among the guests in exchange for the truth of his identity.

A revision: A young couple must solve the mystery of their imprisonment in a surreal hotel masquerade ball to recover their lost memories.
on When a lonely, aging Aussie truckie finds a city girl online, he must reveal a deathly secret to win her.

I agree that this makes it sound like the truck driver is the creepy antagonist. If not, maybe you're trying to say he must reveal his darkest secret to win her love? Not sure the logline is suggesting enough of…
on A man with no memory is trapped in a mysterious hotel, controlled by an oppressive host who forces him to to catch a killer among the guests in exchange for the truth of his identity.

Yes, you've summed up the challenges very well.
on A man with no memory is trapped in a mysterious hotel, controlled by an oppressive host who forces him to to catch a killer among the guests in exchange for the truth of his identity.

sci-fi mystery. A "Twilight Zone" story.
on A man with no memory is trapped in a mysterious hotel, controlled by an oppressive host who forces him to to catch a killer among the guests in exchange for the truth of his identity.

The bidding is the "catch a killer" part of the original log line, but I'm starting to think it gives the wrong impression.
on A man with no memory is trapped in a mysterious hotel, controlled by an oppressive host who forces him to to catch a killer among the guests in exchange for the truth of his identity.

Perhaps this is more compelling: A defiantly curious man is trapped in a mysterious hotel controlled by an oppressive host, and must do his bidding to unlock his memories and reunite with his lost love.
on A man with no memory is trapped in a mysterious hotel, controlled by an oppressive host who forces him to to catch a killer among the guests in exchange for the truth of his identity.

Thanks for the feedback. I think you've asked the right questions. The man can't just leave the hotel because he's "trapped". Why is he trapped? Can't say without giving away the third act secrets. That's what makes this kind of…

A man with no memory is trapped in a mysterious hotel, controlled by an oppressive host who forces him to to catch a killer among the guests in exchange for the truth of his identity.