1. Posted: February 8, 2018In:

    After the mysterious death of his colleague, a scientist discovers one of their test subject is awake to exact revenge on those involved in making him an undead

    AsheJo Logliner

    The protagonist's goal must be mentioned in the logline itself (not the description). So the undead is not the antagonist? It's the 'bad scientist' that's the antagonist? Reading the logline I thought it was the undead subject, but on reading your description I'm not so sure anymore. The antagonistRead more

    The protagonist’s goal must be mentioned in the logline itself (not the description).
    So the undead is not the antagonist? It’s the ‘bad scientist’ that’s the antagonist? Reading the logline I thought it was the undead subject, but on reading your description I’m not so sure anymore. The antagonist should be clearly mentioned.
    Other than that it sounds really good! I can see a lot of potential in this one, maybe a weak and timid protagonist who’s terrified of the undead, but still wants to do the right thing. Plenty of food for conflict here!

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  2. Posted: February 15, 2018In:

    When a black high school football star mysteriously disappears, his four daring friends and their dog set out to find him, unraveling the dark secrets of their small town and a possible serial killer among the town?s elite.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter

    Four teens find themselves hunted by a serial killer who is protected by their town eliate after they start investigating their friends disappearance. Loose the dog. The dog is nothing to the story. If it is make it the protagonist. A dog takes his four humans to discover the fate of his owner who wRead more

    Four teens find themselves hunted by a serial killer who is protected by their town eliate after they start investigating their friends disappearance.

    Loose the dog. The dog is nothing to the story. If it is make it the protagonist.

    A dog takes his four humans to discover the fate of his owner who was the victim of a serial killer with influence in the police.

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  3. Posted: February 5, 2018In:

    When an assassin whose mind is reformatted after every 72 hours falls for his latest target he will use his skills to take down those targeting her before his mind resets again.

    dpg Singularity

    >>>?but it may turn out he has been programmed to love her... Or so he thinks.? Or so he fears, that his attraction to her is love only a simulcarum.? He's not sure his feelings for her are real and therefore neither is the audience. A good thematic twist to keep the audience guessing to thRead more

    >>>?but it may turn out he has been programmed to love her…

    Or so he thinks.? Or so he fears, that his attraction to her is love only a simulcarum.? He’s not sure his feelings for her are real and therefore neither is the audience. A good thematic twist to keep the audience guessing to the very last scene.

    >>get the order cancelled, so his firm won?t hunt her, which will trigger a reboot

    A necessary step to achieving the objective goal, but not THE objective goal, so it need not to be part of the logline.? All we need to know is he’s programmed to kill her — but he wants to save her life.? Details to follow in the script.

    Again, this is a movie I would want to see. I think you’ve got a very interesting premise.? Best wishes

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