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  1. Posted: January 14, 2021In: Drama

    When a seemingly crazy man claims to be his wife’s rightful husband, a troubled counselor must must act like the seemingly crazy man if he’s to save his collapsing marriage.”

    Luke Ramsden Logliner
    Added an answer on January 14, 2021 at 9:57 pm

    There's a lot going here, so I think it might be best to clarify a few things. First of all, who is the protagonist? The crazy man, the wife or the counsellor (who I'm assuming is the actual husband? That's something else that needs to be made clear). Secondly, what is the protagonist's goal or aim?Read more

    There’s a lot going here, so I think it might be best to clarify a few things.
    First of all, who is the protagonist? The crazy man, the wife or the counsellor (who I’m assuming is the actual husband? That’s something else that needs to be made clear).
    Secondly, what is the protagonist’s goal or aim? Whoever they are, what to do they want?
    Thirdly, why is the counsellor’s marriage failing? Why does crazy man claim to be the husband, why must the counsellor act like him, and why does the wife belief this? If the story is a mystery, and these are questions that drive the plot, then considering asking explaining the situation that allow these things to happen?

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  2. Posted: January 13, 2021In: Drama

    Four friends must stop a blackmailer with evidence of a death they covered up.

    Mike Pedley Singularity
    Added an answer on January 13, 2021 at 7:39 pm

    Did they commit murder? If not, why not?? Up the stakes! Can you focus on one of the four as the leader? Even in most ensemble films, there is one character who (not always but often) acts as the protagonist - Danny Ocean in Ocean's 11, Gordy in Stand By Me, Mikey in The Goonies for example. It's haRead more

    Did they commit murder? If not, why not?? Up the stakes!

    Can you focus on one of the four as the leader? Even in most ensemble films, there is one character who (not always but often) acts as the protagonist – Danny Ocean in Ocean’s 11, Gordy in Stand By Me, Mikey in The Goonies for example. It’s handy for the audience to have one pair of eyes through which to feel the journey with – an emotional conduit.

    I feel like this would head into Thriller/Horror territory. “I Know What You Did Last Summer”, “Blackmail”, “The Machinist” are just a few that spring to mind.

    What’s the inciting incident? What started them on this road?

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  3. Posted: January 13, 2021In: Drama

    A martriarch fights to keep her family together amid hurtful secrets.

    Mike Pedley Singularity
    Added an answer on January 13, 2021 at 7:11 pm

    Why do we care if the family stays together? What sort of secrets are we talking about? How is she going to keep her family together? Is this happening over a year? Or over one crazy afternoon (I think one crazy afternoon is better)? Who is the matriarch? Give her a characteristic. Something that flRead more

    Why do we care if the family stays together? What sort of secrets are we talking about? How is she going to keep her family together? Is this happening over a year? Or over one crazy afternoon (I think one crazy afternoon is better)?

    Who is the matriarch? Give her a characteristic. Something that fleshes her out and makes her real for the reader – she’s your main character after all and the weight of the entire plot rests on her shoulders… she deserves a little more.

    Most importantly, what’s the hook? What sets this story apart from other domestic issue films?

    Check out Ordinary People and Festen for great examples.

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