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When a bookshop goes bankrupt, life is thrown into uncertainty for those who call it home. ‘D’ is eager to win a chance to launch her music career and finally escape her crippling double life. ‘B’ has a fatal secret she keeps from her surrogate children and sets out on a personal quest. While ‘W’ just lets life pass him by as he’s forced to come to grips with his sexuality and the prospect of his father never coming back for him.
This logline presents a scenario with three protagonists in three story threads running in tandem.? The standard logline formula doesn't apply.What is needed is a logline that ties the story threads together, a unifying theme, dramatic problem, objective goal.? Right now, I don't see what the unifyiRead more
This logline presents a scenario with three protagonists in three story threads running in tandem.? The standard logline formula doesn’t apply.
What is needed is a logline that ties the story threads together, a unifying theme, dramatic problem, objective goal.? Right now, I don’t see what the unifying factor is other than that they all worked at the same place — but that only applies to the 1st Act.? After that, the characters and their action lines seem to scatter to the wind.
What is the unifying? factor that ties story threads together for the rest of the film?
See lessDriven by the impoverishment surrounding his family and community, a timid young man attempts to take back the land stolen from his ancestors. Based on a true story of [US State/Country] infamy. (Title: Trespass Against Those)
Agreed with DPG, the specifics of the story will help the reader picture it in their mind. Instead of saying that he's driven by impoverishment, I'de describe one particular event, which exemplifies the impoverishment, that motivated him to take action. Otherwise, the story has no specific startingRead more
Agreed with DPG, the specifics of the story will help the reader picture it in their mind.
Instead of saying that he’s driven by impoverishment, I’de describe one particular event, which exemplifies the impoverishment, that motivated him to take action. Otherwise, the story has no specific starting point.
See lessWhen his kinky girlfriend is apprehended by bounty hunters, a rich playboy is forced to team up with a hot-headed southern belle, as they delve into the seedy world of LA?s high-class S&M society, hoping to uncover clues to her whereabouts.
As Richiev said.? ?If there's a bounty on her head, then there's no mystery where she is; she will have been booked into the Sybil Brand facility for women in the L.A. County jail system pending her trial.? ?If there's a contract on her head put there by a gangster, then who knows where she is.A bouRead more
As Richiev said.? ?If there’s a bounty on her head, then there’s no mystery where she is; she will have been booked into the Sybil Brand facility for women in the L.A. County jail system pending her trial.? ?If there’s a contract on her head put there by a gangster, then who knows where she is.
A bounty is legal; a contract is extra-legal.? Which one applies?
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