bec

0 points

1 points to Penpusher

1 logline
6 reviews

Loglines

Diane Perry the sickly daughter of an East End Fishmonger searches for perfection. She will find faith in the East, but only one Eastern monk will find faith in her.

July 15, 2013

Recent reviews

on 14 months after a virus wipes out the human race, a lone survivor fights to stay alive on the empty streets of London, battling her own mind as she looks back at the life she lost.

Yes, I agree with jamesmicheal. A goal is desireable. You may also want to make your character more interesting to define it from other movies who have addressed this topic. Perhaps even through it on another planet so we feel…
on Money found on legal salvage seems Heaven-sent to a young mariner who just inherited a gutted business ? until its criminal owners target his friends and family in the close-knit coastal town.

It's really good! Congrats!
on When a rival Japanese ojek (motorcycle) company comes to Jakarta and steals their workforce, a reckless wannabe streetracer must prevent his business from closing.

It's much better! Congratulations!
on On the run after robbing a bank during the great depression, two brothers find themselves trapped in the harsh region known as the Dust Bowl where a ruthless killer hunts them down.

Hi Cameron: I believe that one of the brothers is the protagonist and you may want to define this, and him, so you can write from his POV. I love the idea of being in the Dust Bowl it is…
on When a rival Japanese company steals all their employees, a reckless wannabe street-racer must help his mother save their failing ojek business. (An ojek is a motorcycle based form of public transport; like a motorcycle taxi. Very common in Indonesia).

Hi I agree with jamesmichael...if your movie is set in a westernized country definately remove the part in brackets as it takes away from the story and change 'Ojek' to motorcycle. If it is set in Indonesia then put motorcycle…
on Heartbroken after being dumped by his longtime girlfriend, a guy?s best friends devise the perfect plan for his recovery and teach him how to sleep with as many women as humanly possible.

Hi Cameron... Think you have covered all the bases and your logline is pretty good. My only feedback is that although the title is catchy, it is alluding that your script is a horror film and this may turn away…